No Soup for You

If you’re not having a love affair with cheese you probably aren’t living a happy life.

Why should I not be a counselor?

Because I’m here to fuel your addiction.

But only to cheese. …and maybe chocolate. But not to crack. That’s bad kids.

So to tempt you this holiday season I have concocted a devilishly delicious dish (I apologize, the alliteration was involuntarily brought on by practice SAT questions).

French Onion Soup topped with CHEEESE BREAD (because what’s life without a little adventure)

Now it is terribly important that you find these items, failure to do so will result in the termination of your mission:

1 cup whole milk (Use skim and I will send an angry cow to your house. Be afraid. Be very afraid.)

2 ¼ cups unbleached flour

1 tbsp. sugar

½ tsp. kosher salt

2 ¼ tsp. instant yeast (¼ oz. packet)

1 egg

8 oz. Cheddar Cheese (I prefer New York Extra Sharp) cut into ½ inch pieces

  1. Heat the milk to 130 degrees Fahrenheit. Remove from heat.
  2. Beat together 1 cup flour, the sugar, the salt, and the yeast. Add the hot milk and mix until combined.
  3. Add the egg. Beat for two minutes.

I found this picture accidentally and it made me feel like a terrible human being.

Then I got over it.

  1. Add the remaining flour (1 ¾ cups for those of you mathematically challenged)

I have those moments sometimes. But given the temperature of the universe those aliens should probably consider wearing some form of a protective hat.

  1. Mix for five minutes or until a finger inserted in the dough comes out clean.
  2. Fold the cheese into the dough as you kneed for a couple of minutes. Place the dough in a greased loaf pan and let rise for 45 minutes, covered by a towel.
  3. Bake at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for 45 minutes.

Now pretend you have patience and resist the urge to devour the entire loaf and set it aside whilst you make the soup.

And now a soup recipe for you. But first, a Seinfeld clip to brighten your day.


½ cup butter (unsalted)

4 onions, thinly sliced

2 cloves garlic, minced

2 bay leaves

2 sprigs of thyme

1 cup red wine (It was a total accident but I kind of sort of maybe let the bottle of Chianti slip and it was more like 1 ½ cups that fell in. I know, I know. It’s truly terrible.)

3 tbsp. all-purpose flour

2 quarts beef broth 1 loaf of AMAZINGLY FANTASTIC CHEESE BREAD. Cut into cubes.

Gruyere, cheddar, and parmesan cheese to top off the soup with

Your directions for how to destroy the world via jaw dropping soup:

  1. Sautee the onions with the butter, flour, and garlic until translucent.
  2. Add the wine to the beef broth and let simmer with the bay leaves and thyme for a very long time. I let this go on for a little over a day, but a much shorter amount of time will suffice if necessary.
  3. Portion out the soup into bowls, top with bread cubes and the cheese assortment, then place under the broiler until the cheese is bubbly and delicious.

Enjoy being French for the day 🙂

Live, laugh, love, bake,

Marley and Me


One thought on “No Soup for You

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